‘All I Had on My Mind Was: I Need to Not Be Pregnant’: A Wife and Husband Share Their Abortion Story

In July 2022, Sarah* returned home after visiting her sister for a few days and discovered she was pregnant. It was just weeks after the U.S. Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, and everything had, as Sarah put it, "gone to shit."

She and her husband Matt* knew they wanted an abortion, and specifically, as a survivor of domestic abuse, Sarah wanted a medication abortion—a way to feel a sense of control over what was happening to her body. But getting care in post-Roe America is complicated, and she was having difficulty accessing one in their home state. While the two were ultimately successful—Sarah describes her abortion as "peaceful"—at times, the process left them feeling frustrated, lonely, and in light of the country's shifting laws, scared. "Since Roe fell, there has been so much uncertainty, and it's felt like the laws could change at the drop of a hat," Matt said. "If politicians ban abortion entirely, who are they going to come after next?" When asked whether she considered the potential legal ramifications of traveling across state lines to end her pregnancy, Sarah said: "In the moment, it didn't cross my mind, because all I had on my mind was: I need to not be pregnant."

In the U.S., abortion is often presented in a silo, an occurrence affecting a singular person. But the reality is that abortion care—and the barriers to it—affect couples, families, parents, friends, entire communities. Pregnant people overwhelmingly bear the brunt of anti-abortion laws, but we do them a disservice when we ignore how hurdles to health care also affect those around them.

Here, you'll find both Sarah and Matt's abortion stories, told separately and in their own words. (*Due to privacy concerns, Sarah and Matt's names and their location have been changed or withheld.) Because of differing and fluctuating laws, the actions described below may violate the law in several states. Be sure to research your own state if you're considering an abortion, and for more information on accessing medication abortion via telehealth, check out places like Hey Jane, Plan C, and carafem.

View in Browser  She and her husband Matt* knew they wanted an abortion, and specifically, as a survivor of domestic abuse, Sarah wanted a medication abortion—a way to feel a sense of control over what was happening to her body. But getting care in post-Roe America is complicated, and she was having difficulty accessing one in their home state. While the two were ultimately successful—Sarah describes her abortion as "peaceful"—at times, the process left them feeling frustrated, lonely, and in light of the country's shifting laws, scared. "Since Roe fell, there has been so much uncertainty, and it's felt like the laws could change at the drop of a hat," Matt said. "If politicians ban abortion entirely, who are they going to come after next?" When asked whether she considered the potential legal ramifications of traveling across state lines to end her pregnancy, Sarah said: "In the moment, it didn't cross my mind, because all I had on my mind was: I need to not be pregnant." In the U.S., abortion is often presented in a silo, an occurrence affecting a singular person. But the reality is that abortion care—and the barriers to it—affect couples, families, parents, friends, entire communities. Pregnant people overwhelmingly bear the brunt of anti-abortion laws, but we do them a disservice when we ignore how hurdles to health care also affect those around them. Here, you'll find both Sarah and Matt's abortion stories, told separately and in their own words. (*Due to privacy concerns, Sarah and Matt's names and their location have been changed or withheld.) Because of differing and fluctuating laws, the actions described below may violate the law in several states. Be sure to research your own state if you're considering an abortion, and for more information on accessing medication abortion via telehealth, check out places like Hey Jane, Plan C, and carafem." title="In July 2022, Sarah* returned home after visiting her sister for a few days and discovered she was pregnant. It was just weeks after the U.S. Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, and everything had, as Sarah put it, "gone to shit." She and her husband Matt* knew they wanted an abortion, and specifically, as a survivor of domestic abuse, Sarah wanted a medication abortion—a way to feel a sense of control over what was happening to her body. But getting care in post-Roe America is complicated, and she was having difficulty accessing one in their home state. While the two were ultimately successful—Sarah describes her abortion as "peaceful"—at times, the process left them feeling frustrated, lonely, and in light of the country's shifting laws, scared. "Since Roe fell, there has been so much uncertainty, and it's felt like the laws could change at the drop of a hat," Matt said. "If politicians ban abortion entirely, who are they going to come after next?" When asked whether she considered the potential legal ramifications of traveling across state lines to end her pregnancy, Sarah said: "In the moment, it didn't cross my mind, because all I had on my mind was: I need to not be pregnant." In the U.S., abortion is often presented in a silo, an occurrence affecting a singular person. But the reality is that abortion care—and the barriers to it—affect couples, families, parents, friends, entire communities. Pregnant people overwhelmingly bear the brunt of anti-abortion laws, but we do them a disservice when we ignore how hurdles to health care also affect those around them. Here, you'll find both Sarah and Matt's abortion stories, told separately and in their own words. (*Due to privacy concerns, Sarah and Matt's names and their location have been changed or withheld.) Because of differing and fluctuating laws, the actions described below may violate the law in several states. Be sure to research your own state if you're considering an abortion, and for more information on accessing medication abortion via telehealth, check out places like Hey Jane, Plan C, and carafem."> 'All I Had on My Mind Was: I Need to Not Be Pregnant': A Wife and Husband Share Their Abortion Story In July 2022, Sarah* returned home after visiting her sister for a few days and discovered she was pregnant. It was just weeks after the U.S. Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, and everything had, as Sarah put it, "gone to shit." She and her husband Matt* knew they wanted an abortion, and specifically, as a survivor of domestic abuse, Sarah wanted a medication abortion—a way to feel a sense of control over what was happening to her body. But getting care in post-Roe America is complicated, and she was having difficulty accessing one in their home state. While the two were ultimately successful—Sarah describes her abortion as "peaceful"—at times, the process left them feeling frustrated, lonely, and in light of the country's shifting laws, scared. "Since Roe fell, there has been so much uncertainty, and it's felt like the laws could change at the drop of a hat," Matt said. "If politicians ban abortion entirely, who are they going to come after next?" When asked whether she considered the potential legal ramifications of traveling across state lines to end her pregnancy, Sarah said: "In the moment, it didn't cross my mind, because all I had on my mind was: I need to not be pregnant." In the U.S., abortion is often presented in a silo, an occurrence affecting a singular person. But the reality is that abortion care—and the barriers to it—affect couples, families, parents, friends, entire communities. Pregnant people overwhelmingly bear the brunt of anti-abortion laws, but we do them a disservice when we ignore how hurdles to health care also affect those around them. Here, you'll find both Sarah and Matt's abortion stories, told separately and in their own words. (*Due to privacy concerns, Sarah and Matt's names and their location have been changed or withheld.) Because of differing and fluctuating laws, the actions described below may violate the law in several states. Be sure to research your own state if you're considering an abortion, and for more information on accessing medication abortion via telehealth, check out places like Hey Jane, Plan C, and carafem. READ MORE   Taylor Swift, Selena Gomez, Sophie Turner, and Brittany Mahomes Go to Dinner in Manhattan It was a big night. READ MORE   Travis Kelce Was Asked if He's in Love With Taylor Swift and His Answer Was Surprising He then joked about how she changes his game play. 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